I have “that kid”. The one that bites, hits and pinches. I think that maybe she only bites, hits and pinches me, and occasionally my hubby. I think she bit her grandma once. I’m not sure what I did to deserve all of the physical abuse, and I’m even less sure on how to stop it. What do you do when your toddler LAUGHS at you while you tell her that biting hurts?
If someone can please locate my sweet and cuddly baby please let me know. I’d like to make a trade for the naughty toddler model.
So, here we are, a year (plus a week and some change) after I became a mother. This was a big year all around. Had a child, built a house, moved into that house, sold a condo…its been momentous to say the least. I’ve smiled a lot, laughed a lot, cried a lot, slept (not) a lot and even learned a lot. Here are a couple things I’ve learned
1. Labor and delivery is not as scary as you think it will be. Just get an epidural (DISCLAIMER: If anyone happens to come upon this blog that is staunchly antiepidural, I apologize. The epidural was the second best part of my labor. Oh, sweet relief)
2. Parenting is A LOT scarier than I thought it would be
3. Sleep when the baby sleeps is the single best piece of advice I got. Naps are your friend.
4. Breaking ground on a new house when your child is two weeks old really, really stupid stressful.
5. When someone offers help, whether it comes in the form of food, babysitting or whatever, TAKE IT. Whoever said it takes a village to raise a child wasn’t lying. It took a village to get me bathed everyday.
6. If think someone might mind your bad breath, don’t sit to close to them. You might have forget to brush your teeth before they came over, and MAN is that embarassing.
7. Some days, deoderant, clean underware, body spray and a ponytail are your best friends.
8. Your grandma/mother-in-law/best friend/etc doesn’t know everything. Every baby is different and if sleeping on the couch with your child on your chest gets everyone a little sleep, DO IT.
9. Your doctor doesn’t know everything either. A good doctor will listen to you. There is such a thing as mother’s instinct. Trust it.
10. Yes, its this hard for everyone. Anyone who tells you different is either: A. Lying, B. Crazy or C. All of the above.
11. You will miss when they are little and snuggly. You will forget that you never slept, showered, brushed your teeth or ate a warm meal. They will grow up, and start walking and never want to snuggle. I promise, this day will come. You will sit on their first birthday and cry, because your baby? Is not a baby anymore.
I could really go on and on, but the single most important thing I have learned in my one year of motherhood is best summed up by this quote:
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Today was a rough day. Annelise is teething and just refuses to be happy. She wasn’t happy being held, sitting on my lap, being played with orbeing left alone. She hated what I made her for breakfast and lunch (thankfully pizza did the trick for dinner). She didn’t want a bottle, but that sippy cup? What a bunch of crap.
Couple that with not a lot of napping, some PMS and disappointment over not being pregnant this month on my part, and you have the making of a no good, really bad day.
Then tonight, I read a story of a woman that went full term in her pregnancy, labored for 20 hours, had a csection and lost her son. Suddenly, I wanted to go in, wake my sleeping baby and squeeze her as tight as I could.
You see, the crabby Annelise is really only 1/1000th of our life. The rest is filled with her squealing with delight in the bathtub and giving her dad kisses. Its about her pride when she learned to walk and the joy of petting the dog. Its about my heart being so full of love I feel like it might burst, only to find that it swells a little more each time she smiles at me. Because my life? It is truely blessed.
Annelise officially started walking yesterday. She took about 5 steps, enough to get her form the front door at my in-law’s house to the chair I was sitting in. We were all in shock. After she grabbed hold of the chair, she looked up with pride written all over her face. She literally beamed as we all clapped for her. I nearly cried. Because my baby? is not really a baby anymore. She walks. And talks. I can’t even believe it.
Annelise said her first real word today. She’s been babbling and making “dada” etc type noises for a few months now, but today was THE BIG word day.
When Troy comes home from work, we usually stand at the open door and watch him. Annelise is such a daddy’s girl she loves it. Today, she kept saying “Da-de, da-de”. Later on, I asked her where daddy was, she turned to look at him and said “da-de”. I have never, ever seen him look so proud and happy before. Not even at our wedding! (Although that was a proud and happy day too, just in a different way, obviously)
Now, I have to admit I am SLIGHTLY disappointed she doesn’t even really say mama yet. She says the “ma” sound occasionally, but not often. In fact, I think she’s probably going to say “doggy” before she says mama. Thats ok, though.
Now that she’s talking, I wonder if she’ll be like her mom and never shut up? 
Tomorrow AK is going to be 9 months old. NINE MONTHS! That is as long as I was pregnant and I assure you, this 9 months went by a lot faster than those first nine.
I still can’t really believe where my little baby has gone. She’s no longer little that is for sure. She had her nine month appointment earlier this week. She weighs in at 17 pounds 9 ounces (still a bit of a peanut compared to some of her baby buddies). She’s 29.5 inches long. The doctor pronounced her perfectly healthy and the cutest baby patient he has ever had. I’m sure he says that all his patients, but I’d like to believe it
She’s hell on all fours lately. She LOVES to chase around the dog and also loves the dogs water dish. She seems to think its a mini splash pool meant just for her. Its amazing how quickly she learns things now. I know she was learning quickly before, but now its like she masters something new every single day! This is a really, really fun age, its just a little more labor intensive!
I have a small vent about showers and I’m not talking about the wet kind. I’m talking about the kind that involve gifts, for weddings or babies.
I like showers. I had two when I was married, and three when I was pregnant. I’ve thrown several, and will be throwing one again this summer. I understand that showers are traditionally gift giving occasions. They are for “showering” the bride or new mother with gifts. What I DO NOT understand is the sense of entitlement that has been taking over the new generation of brides and mothers-to-be.
I attended two showers this past weekend. One was a couples shower honoring my cousin and her soon-to-be-husband. They both reside in Florida, but the shower (and wedding) are in Wisconsin. They also had a shower in the groom’s home state of Michigan. This created a problem for them. How would they get their gifts home to Florida?
Do you think they made this their guests problem? No, they did not. They handled it with class, graciously accepting the gifts they were given and creating a solution themselves. Several shower attendees (myself included) shipped their gifts to Florida but many did not. Did they complain? No.
The second shower was on sunday for my set-cousin’s soon-to-be-wife. I have to admit that I was a little surprised that I was even invited to this shower. I had never met the bride before, and I really have had little to no contact with my step cousin for several years. I feel that showers are for those closest to the bride, but perhaps my family did not want to leave me out.
The groom resides in Washington State, and the bride will be joining him their shortly after their wedding. Because of this, the shower hostesses felt it was appropriate to include a note in the invites requesting CASH gifts for the bride. In fact, the couple did not register simply because they preferred cash over physical gifts.
I find this absolutely appalling. I understand the practicality of this, but it was approached in completely the wrong way. I feel strongly that showers are for gifts, not cash. If they did not want to receive gifts to move, they should have refused a shower, or had a bridal tea and told people they preferred not to get gifts.
In the bride’s defense, I’m not sure the note was her idea. She very graciously accepted my gift. I think it may have gone over much better if this had been spread by word of mouth, and if anyone wishing to give an actual gift was not put down and told they were rude (as I was). The experience just contrasted so much with the shower I had attended the previous day that I was completely baffled that anyone would act that way.
The other thing I despise about showers are mothers-to-be that feel that their shower guests are there to outfit them with everything they need for their child. Troy’s cousin had a baby shower this past weekend , and my mother in law told me that she was unhappy because “all she got were small items like bottles and bibs. No one bought their big items and they need those!” (My mother in law did not agree with this, she was simply the messenger)
When did parents forget that having a baby is THEIR responsibility? When did it become the responsibility of their family and friends to provide for their child? We received many lovely gifts for our showers before I had Annelise. We had several large items that were NOT purchased. To be honest, I did not expect them to be! They were expensive and the only reason I had them on my registry was because I know my family members somethings like to go in on gifts.
Troy and I fully expected to purchase anything and everything we needed for Annelise ourselves. That is our JOB as her parents, to provide for her needs. We were pleasantly surprised that our family and friends were so generous.
Where did this sense of entitlement come from? When did people start placing more value in their “wants” than in manners? Am I the only one that sees a problem with this? Or am I just a snob?
